AKPORS IS DEAD....NOW ITS AKPAN

AKPORS IS DEAD....NOW ITS AKPAN

AKPAN bought a new mobile phone. He
sent a message to everyone on his phone
book.
The message reads: My mobile number
has changed; earlier it was Nokia 3310,
now it is Nokia 6610. Please take note! In a conversation
AKPAN : I am proud because my son is in
Medical College
Friend: Really? What is he studying?
AKPAN: No, he is not studying, they are
studying him. Akpan visits his Doctor :
AKPAN: Doctor, in my dreams I play
football every night.
DOCTOR: Take these drugs and you will be
okay.
AKPAN: Can I take it tomorrow? Tonight is the final game.
Akpan and his wife :
AKPAN: If tomorrow I die, will you
remarry?
Wife: No! I will stay with my sister but if
I die will you remarry? AKPAN: No, I will also stay with your sister.
AKPAN: People consider me as a “GOD”
Wife: How do you know?
AKPAN: When I went to the park today,
everybody said, oh GOD, you have come
again. AKPAN comes back to his car and finds a
note saying “parking fine” He writes a
note and sticks it to a pole “Thanks for
the compliment”
How do you recognise Akpan in school?
He is the one who erases the notes from his book when the teacher cleans the
board.
Once AKPAN was walking, he had a glove
in one hand and none on the other hand.
So a man asked him why he did so. He
replied: The weather forecast announced that on one hand, it would be cold and on
the other hand it would be hot
AKPAN: Why are all these people
running?
Man: This is a race; the winner will get
the cup. AKPAN: If only the winner will get the
Cup, why are the others running?
In a classroom:
Teacher: “I killed a person. Convert this
sentence into future tense”
AKPAN: The future tense is “You will go to jail”
AKPAN told his servant: “Go and water
the plants!” Servant: “It is already
raining”
AKPAN: “So what? Take an umbrella and
go”